My whole life I have hated authority and arbitrary rules. The following is my literary middle finger to student loans and neckties.
I’ve been working at a corporation in Japan for a little over a year. It has been an interesting experience to be sure but there is one aspect that I hate more than all the others. I am required to wear a necktie.
Neckties are the most asinine piece of apparel to ever be invented. It is literally a strangulation device. You pull on one end and the noose gets tighter, pull on the other and the knot gets tighter. It’s a lose-lose situation for you.
Furthermore, ties don’t serve any fucking purpose whatsoever. None. Zip. Zero. Zilch. I don’t need to elaborate any more on this point because no one can prove me wrong.
So, I’m ready to dive into starting my own business… well, not completely. There is a big hurdle in front of me that keeps eating up funds that I would otherwise use for seed money: student loans.
I don’t need to explain to my American readers the incredible burden posed by student loans but I will take a moment to describe them to my non-American readers.
Imagine this. You’ve signed up for an Olympic qualifier for the Marathon that you’ve spent your life training for. You followed the rules, practiced hard, and studied everything that was recommended by the experts. Finally, it’s race day and you step up to the starting line, excited to prove yourself and the Olympic Committee decides to attach one end of a chain to your scrotum and the other to a bull that is charging in the opposite direction. Then the race begins.
So that’s what it’s like to be American and have student loans.
Now, let’s get existential for a moment. We only get one go at life. ONLY ONE RIDE. Now, the first 18 years of our lives were largely dictated by our parents and by those “experts” called teachers. Now, I think a good many of you that are reading this were basically told from birth that the way to succeed was to “get good grades, go to college, get a job, buy a house, then retire and live out the rest of your days doing what you want.”
We were sold a bill of goods. It’s all just a fucking scam. Raised from birth on a set of ideas of what you need to do to get ahead and you’re tossed into the world as a hormonally driven 18-year-old and expected to make perfectly rational financial decisions despite receiving no financial education in school.
As I mentioned before, we only have one life to live and I think it is absolutely essential that we live that life to fullest. So if paying student loans gets in the way of me pursuing my dreams, why should I give a fuck about them? Seriously. I only have one life.
I fully understand what will happen if I default. Debt collectors, a fucked credit rating, and the seizure of tax refunds and future social security checks. Here’s the thing, though. I don’t have any assets for them to seize, I don’t want a house so I don’t need a good credit rating, and I never planned on getting social security checks to begin with.
This is a controversial idea and my thoughts are still evolving on it. For the time being, I am still paying my fucking student loans but I wanted to share these thoughts with you and hear your thoughts. So get at me and lemme know what you think.
Further Reading on Student Loans: